Phobia: a persistent, irrational fear of a specific object, activity, or situation that leads to a compelling desire to avoid it.

I have an irrational fear of "Mom Jeans". While I have no idea where it came from, I am terrified of the high-waisted, 10 mile long zipper, unflattering butt pocket jeans. Where is the flattery in wearing a pair of light denim jeans that go all the way up to your boobs? I have yet to find a guy that looks at this picture and says, "what a beautiful group of ladies".

I call this a phobia because I am nowhere near the age of being a mom. I have yet to find a guy, so there is no need for me to cower in fear of the all-encompassing selection of mom jeans found in any department store.


POP QUIZ: Which do you prefer? the left or right?

I can't even look at the jeans on the right. The tapered ankles, the elastic waistband, the denim color doesn't even look like denim! It terrifies me. I am not joking.

This lead me to another point of frustration: WHY does the mom jean even exist? Fashion designers should not continue to market and sell the mom jean. Women who are mothers that have not lost the "last 5 pounds" of their pregnancy weight should not throw in the towel, so to say, and purchase a pair of mom jeans, feeling the need to submit to whatever little selection of clothing works. Moms should boycott mom jeans and demand for a denim line specifically tailored for moms. If no one else does, I will. Just you wait.


I will not tolerate wearing mom jeans ever, yet I am still afraid. I have convinced myself that I will not do a lot of things, and then 4 weeks later I'll find myself doing the very thing I told myself I would never do. So, I am afraid. What if, 1o years from now, I find myself sitting in front of my blog wearing *gasp* mom jeans?